In the Dock, again

(Editor’s Note – this story refers back to this article: http://mullarea.com/pork/2017/07/11/asking-the-hard-questions/ )

The Undisputed UK Champion of alcohol consumption is due back in court, once again, this week. Christopher While has to stand before some guy in a powdered horse hair wig and answer to charges concerning the possession of Kiddy Pr0n. This is a serious matter, until you realize that the court system over there is administered by people who dress like this:

Seriously, I mean damn.

HELLO? DO YOU HAVE PRINCE ALBERT IN A CAN?

I suspect if I were ever to find myself in a courtroom in the UK, I would have to be sedated. That’s the ONLY way you could stop me from looking at someone dressed like that and not just bust out laughing. Did these lawyers, er, barristers and judges commit some sort of offense themselves, and their sentence is to dress up like a Warner Brothers cartoon character when they come to work?

If it may please the court, until your lordship dresses like a normal human being, I am unable to enter a plea due to insanity. Looking at you is driving me crazy.

2 comments on “In the Dock, again

  1. And it’s another continuance. I have no idea how it works in the UK, but where I worked, you got 2, then the case got tried whether you showed up or not.

    On two separate occasions I saw a District Court judge send a bailiff out to find the attorney of record and haul him in front of the judge to explain where the defendant was. One case got a FTA bench warrant, the other got a summary verdict with an order to arrest and “go directly to jail, do not pass Go, do not collect $200”.

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